A Mommy's Ramble

So it probably seems like I have an unnatural obsession with age. Many of my friends who are older than me (calendar wise not actual age) would say so. But I FEEL old lately. Brett is staring down 30 this year and I'm next. I met Brett at college 10 years ago this year. My adorable baby sister is going to a sweethearts dance at the high school, and after offering her any of my dresses, realized that no one should have to wear a 10 YEAR OLD DRESS! Holy Cow, they're practically vintage. I don't really mind being older so much as I can't stand that I don't know what I've done with all of that time. When I was in high school I had such big plans (remember Bridget?) I should be working at a newspaper or newsmagazine in some big city, wearing pumps to work everyday and wowing everyone with my amazing wit. Hiking to the top of mountains and visiting exotic places. Or at least I should have finished my pre-law BA and the went to law school. I think I'm just restless. I love being a mother. I LOVE my kids, they are the greatest thing ever. Who can help but feel wonderful when they hear a little voice say, "I love you Mommy!"? I love the feeling of a clean house, that I put together, eating a meal with my family that I made (allergies and all), and even doing taxes because it makes me feel smart. Somewhere along the mommy trail I seem to have lost my knowledge of correct grammar, my hip taste in music (okay so I never had that but I do miss the concerts,) and I even leave the house in sweat pants occasionally- no really, I have!! :) I seem to be filled with all kinds of ideas for a small business or a book or things that other people do, why not me? But I know the most important thing I can do right now is be Tucker, Clay, and Luka's Mommy. At least it keeps me busy, very very busy. Well I guess I'll settle for the little triumphs in my life. They may not seem like a big deal to the world but they are to me. Like surviving a trip to Walmart with all three kids by myself, completing the laundry all in one day AND having it put away by the time Brett is home, or keeping the budget in line (a girl can dream can't she). I love my life with the greatest guy a girl could ask for, and my smart little rugrats (Tucker can SPELL words like machine, enough, people, anything!) but sometimes I wish I could go back to that insecure girl in high school and tell her, "Yes you can!!!" :) Wow, if you made it through this post you are a trooper, and deserve a pat on the back! I think I'll reward myself with some chocolate, may I suggest you do the same?! :)